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How to tell your adult children that you’re divorcing

On Behalf of | Jun 9, 2022 | Divorce

No matter how old your children are, they do not want to see their parents divorce. That is why it is very important to handle the matter with care. To them, the split between mom and dad is bound to be painful, so tread lightly.

When you do inform your adult children that you intend to divorce both parents should be there. Your children may be raising families of their own, but they may revert back to feeling like youngsters when you have this discussion. They will need reassurances from both parents that everything will work out in the end.

How to address the situation

Sitting down as a family unit to discuss your impending divorce can be unnerving. Following these tips can help you get through this difficult discussion:

  • Keep things civil. Do not argue or cast blame on your spouse and do not put your children in the middle. They need you to respect each other and concentrate on them instead of you at this moment.
  • Reassure them that you both love them. Your children may feel like everything they remember from their childhood is a lie. Remind them that those happy times were real and you will always treasure them.
  • Listen to your children’s questions. Be prepared for anything they might ask the two of you. Answer them honestly and without blaming your spouse.
  • Understand that they may be angry. Give them time to process what you’ve said and allow them to feel their emotions without judgment. Be patient if you have to repeat yourself a few times. 

While you can not control your children’s reactions, you can be there for them just as you’ve always been. Divorce is never easy and you may need help to get through the process.